GOVERNOR'S ISLAND - Several residents of Bay Ridge and Tottenville had strong opinions Tuesday morning about what caused a pack of approximately forty gremlins to commandeer the MV Andrew J. Barberi shortly after midnight, stage an elaborate multi-act theatrical production in the main passenger cabin, and ultimately drive the vessel into the northwestern shore of Governor's Island at a speed witnesses described as "lunacy."
The primary opinion, voiced with some force by Dominic F., 61, of Annadale, was that none of this would have happened if the Staten Island Ferry charged a fare. "You let anyone on," said Dominic, who was not aboard the ferry at the time of the incident and was reached by phone. "This is what happens when you let socialists run the city."
This reporter noted that the Staten Island Ferry has been free since 1997, predating Mayor Zohran Mamdani's administration by approximately twenty-seven years. Mr. Ferraro said that was not the point.
The Barberi departed Whitehall Terminal at 12:41 a.m. with an estimated sixty human passengers and, according to the subsequent incident report filed by the Department of Transportation, "a number of gremlins that proved difficult to count due to their movement patterns and general demeanor." Within minutes of departure, the gremlins had removed four violins and a viola from the cases belonging to the passengers of members of The Philharmonic Players Ensemble at Lincoln Center and begun playing what one passenger described as "technically proficient but emotionally unhinged" renditions of "My Heart Will Go On."
Shortly thereafter, a gremlin wearing what appeared to be a hand-stitched reproduction of a 1912 first-class evening gown climbed to the bow railing, extended both arms, and leaned out over the water. A second gremlin, wearing a workman's coat and holding a sketchbook, approached from behind and placed its claws on the first gremlin's shoulders. Passenger Yolanda M. of Flatbush, said she initially thought it was "kind of sweet, honestly," before remembering where she was. The scene concluded when the gremlin in the gown appeared to begin climbing over the rail. The second gremlin grabbed it by the gown's bustle and dragged it back to safety. The assembled gremlins produced a brief, sharp screech that witnesses interpreted as applause. The gown gremlin was then, according to multiple accounts, escorted to a cleared section of the passenger cabin floor, where it reclined on a wooden bench and took it's clothes off. The sketchbook gremlin produced a piece of charcoal and began drawing.
"We all just kind of stood there," said Marcus T., a graduate student who was the only passenger to remain in the main cabin throughout. "I didn't want to be rude."
The violins resumed.
At approximately 1:17 a.m., for reasons investigators have not yet determined, the gremlin or gremlins who had by that point taken control of the pilothouse altered course sharply to the southeast. The Barberi struck the Governor's Island seawall at intense speeds, sustaining damage to its forward hull section. No human passengers were seriously injured. The ferry's captain, who had been locked in a supply closet since approximately 12:55 a.m., reported minor bruising. The gremlins were described as "unbothered" by the collision and continued playing.
The Brooklyn Gremlin Abatement and Remediation Unit was dispatched at 1:34 a.m. and arrived via emergency vessel at 2:08 a.m. A unit spokesperson confirmed Monday that crews worked through dawn to clear the Barberi and the surrounding Governor's Island area of gremlins. "We went through a full year's allocation of flamethrower fluid," the spokesperson said. "We've submitted the reorder paperwork." The spokesperson declined to characterize the operation as either a success or a failure, describing it instead as "resolved." The Barberi has been taken out of service for hull inspection and what the Department of Transportation described in a statement as "a thorough interior cleaning and a period of reflection."
By Tuesday morning, the incident had become, in certain corners of the outer boroughs, a referendum on municipal transit policy. A small but vocal contingent of residents across Brooklyn, Queens, and the Bronx for the ferry to return to a paid model, arguing that a fare requirement would have provided a meaningful barrier to gremlin access.
This reporter asked whether gremlins, who do not carry OMNY cards or currency of any kind, would be deterred by a fare that they would simply not pay. Several respondents said this was a bureaucratic distinction.
Staten Island residents, when reached, expressed uniform outrage at the fare proposal, though the nature of that outrage shifted when buses were introduced to the conversation. Many residents quickly declined to comment except a one Tony M.: “The ferry needs to stay free, I use it all the time. I shouldn’t have to pay for that.” When asked whether buses should also be free, the man’s expression hardened before he began shouting, “Socialism! Socialism! Socialism!” And then he pushed me down.
Mayor Mamdani held a brief press availability Monday afternoon outside Whitehall Terminal. He said the Staten Island Ferry would remain free. He said he knew nothing of "gremlins" and laughed calling it a good joke. Many Staten Islanders then called him a "socialist" after and also a "communist." He said "Thank-you."
Asked whether the incident reflected any broader failure of the city's late-night maritime security apparatus, the Mayor said, "We will review the situation." He then walked back inside. The Philharmonic Players Ensemble said three of the four stolen violins were recovered. The fourth, and the sketchbook, have not been located.